Dating someone with young children
I had become accustomed to our time alone: picnics at the Hollywood Bowl and the Greek Theatre, decadent meals at Black Market Liquor Bar and Gjelina, ocean-side walks in Santa Monica.
As we inched along the 405 Freeway, my anxiety increased.
I normally Internet stalk my online dating connections pretty thoroughly.
But life had gotten busy, and for a few days I was swiping right on Coffee Meets Bagel without my normal due diligence. Both seemed nice, but I was having trouble keeping them...
“I know it’s against your nature,” she said,”but when it comes to his kids, be a cat, not a dog. (Beth Reno)David’s daughters are sweet and smart, loving and funny and generous and affectionate … I tried to relax, think of the stretch of time ahead of us, remind myself there’s no rush.
You’re going to want to hug them and bond with them, but it’ll be better if you relax and hang back. I had already fallen in love with their father, so what would I do if they didn’t like me? “He’s a director,” I told my friend L., absently fiddling with the lighter in my hand. Because my own parents are divorced, I know what it’s like when Dad has a girlfriend.
Dating someone with kids when you still feel like something of a kid yourself can be a challenge.
The math in putting 1 1 together is hard enough; it’s an equation we spend our whole lives trying to master until at last we form a solid pair. I met someone amazing, and at the same time, met his kids (also amazing). Now, some time later and armed with a better understanding, there are a few things I wish I’d known from the get-go that might have spared me some serious mental struggle: It sounds aggressive, as though I’m telling you that dating someone with kids will ensure you’re always treated second-rate, never coming first and always neglected in some aspect for preferential love to the young ones. The kids will always come first, yes, but if he’s a catch and you’re lucky, you’ll score second place.
Let me tell you about second place: This is where close members of his family reside.
We figured flashing lights and photo booths, prizes and pinball, loud noises and lots of other kids would be a good distraction from “Dad has a girlfriend,” which also means: “Mom and Dad are not getting back together.” I normally Internet stalk my online dating connections pretty thoroughly.
We decided to wait six months before my first meeting with his girls: a trip to the arcade at Castle Park in Sherman Oaks.
But we didn’t meet until OKCupid matched us, and it was love at first sight.